I'm Mad As Hell And I'm Not Going To Take It Anymore

I'm boycotting baseball for the foreseeable future. The game that once meant more to me than anything else, the only thing (other than the end of Purple Rain) that routinely will bring me to tears, will not see another cent from me this season or next season, if there is a next season. Let's put aside the fact that it's the most messed up major sport in the country, that I'm sick and tired of watching the same 3 or 4 bought teams slap each other around in the playoffs and actually exhibit pride when winning, "Yay, we have money, and oh golly, here's a trophy, thanks." Let's even put aside the fact that baseball has destroyed its own legacy with the hyper-inflated offensive numbers because of the small ballparks, harder baseball, harder bats, and steroids (sorry, alleged steroids). I'll even put aside, for now, the fact that there is going to be a strike, it's doubtful that there will be a postseason this year, and every single player in the major leagues probably has a pinky ring that cost more money than I've made in the past 5 years.

I'm sick and tired of the fact that none of these players care. And the owners don't care. Winning doesn't matter. The 2002 All-Star game ending in a tie was the worst travesty to baseball since: hmmm· well since: talk of contracting the Minnesota Twins, not doing random steroid testing, canceling the 1994 World Series, the White Sox uniforms in the mid-80s, I can't go on anymore, this could take all day.

It will be funny in 50 years when baseball has rebounded from this whole current mess, that Bud Selig will be talked about as the man who destroyed major league baseball. This summer I'm making my way through the brilliant 10 DVD Ken Burns' "Baseball," film (which has given me more pleasure than watching baseball this summer), and back in the old days the commissioners ruled with an iron fist, and they were hard and mean and took care of business. Bud Selig whines and pouts and changes his mind, and can't make up his mind and then doesn't stand firm behind his statements. And he's not creative. If Bill Veeck had been the commissioner of baseball he would have figured out what to do, he would have had a promotion, where ten fans picked at random out of the crowd could come down to the field and throw a few warm-up pitches, and then based on crowd applause one throws on an American League hat and the other throws on a National League hat, and they're your new pitchers. Or if I was commissioner and Joe Torre and Bob Brenly came over to me and said, we can't play any more because our pitchers have already thrown an inning and they're tired, boo hoo. I would have told Torre and Brenly to tell their guy to suck it up and stay out there, or better yet, make them get out their and pitch, "fine Joe, if Garcia can't go then it looks like you're going to have to pitch. Because we're going to finish this game, if it takes all night, and your arm falls off, we're finishing this game, and if I see you intentionally groove one to Barry Bonds just to get the game over with, then you're banned from baseball for life."

This tie thing drives me crazy, this isn't a friggin' soccer game, it's baseball. You play to win, and you try to win. When they called the game after 11 innings, none of the players cared, they were actually happy, they got to get a good night's sleep so they could get to the bank and cash their $50,000 incentive checks. They should have cared. Some player should have grabbed Torre by the collar and said, "we're going to finish this game and we're going to beat those National League assholes. If Freddy Garcia can't pitch anymore, then I'll pitch, I don't care if I'm a 3rd baseman, I'll take the hill, I'm not leaving here until this game is over." I'm guessing that Pete Rose through a beer bottle through his TV set when they called the game last night, and its not just because he took the AL giving a half a run.

Oh, and Matt Morris. I thought you took yourself out of the All-Star game because you were sad. Then why were you there? What difference does it make to go out there and throw an inning or not? If you're going to take the All-Star break off to go be sad somewhere, then go be sad somewhere, don't just sit there on the bench, and say, "I can't pitch, I'm too sad." He should have told Brenly that he'd pitch, and win won for his friend Darryle Kile or something, because it's important to us, it should be important to him. These guys have an obligation to the game that has made them millionaires, an obligation to the fans that have made them millionaires, and even if they don't care, they should really try to pretend really hard, we're paying them enough to do it. Lance Berkman, who I used to like, said after the game, "the fans got more than their money's worth. They only paid for nine innings, so they got two innings free." Ha Ha, wink wink, nudge nudge, I'm going to go back to my hotel room and count my money. Go to hell Lance.

This whole game was just a representation of the fact that these guys aren't ballplayers anymore, they're businessmen, it doesn't mean anything to them, so now it doesn't mean anything to me. Join my boycott, don't give them any more money, don't let the owners and the players fight over one more penny. Go to a minor league game, better yet, go to a little league game. Baseball still is the best game ever, but right now Major League Baseball is the worst sport ever.